This One’s for Myself

Recently, I wrote an article for my school newspaper. Coming up with a topic to write about each week grows old and you run out of ideas. Last week, having run out of brilliant ideas, I decided to write on my first controversial topic. Police brutality. In this article, I didn’t cover the issue itself, but instead my opinion on a slight way to lessen it.

After I sent in the completed product, my editors changed the title as well as a few lines. They did not inform me but instead published it.

That became a problem.

Now, I have people telling me back and forth how much they agree and disagree with my article. Some more friendly than others.

As I cried in the bathroom of a building on campus, I realized I am sick of writing for other people. I am sick of being so concerned with what people think of me, about my writing.

So, this one is for me.

I’m not going to add any cute pictures. I’ll leave it blank.

I’m not going to crack funny jokes. I’m going to complain.

I’m not going to check for grammar problems. I’ll leave it how it is.

Im going to talk about me and where I am right now. Keep reading if you want, it doesn’t matter to me. I’m doing this for me, it’s my therapy.

I miss my mom so much. After getting upset today, the first thing I did was call her. I didn’t realize until now how much I miss her. Right now, the only thing I want to do is cuddle with her and sit in silence.

My faith is slowly, but surely, growing. I had hit a bit of a rough patch but so far this year I have relied more on God. I know I’m no where closer to where I need to be, or maybe I wouldn’t have gotten so upset today.

I realize this blog post is stupid and pointless but it helped me. I’ve gotten so used to writing for an audience that I forgot how to write for me. Hopefully I’ll do it more from now on.

If you’ve read all the way through this, thank you. I could really use prayers of encouragement right now. Writing is important to me, I don’t want to let a few instances drag me down.

p.s. I lied. As I kept writing for myself, I felt my heart get happier again. So, here’s a picture:)

IMG_9199

Because I miss these goobers right now.

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One thought on “This One’s for Myself

  1. Oh my, that made me teary! I hope you will continue to do what makes you happy! Unfortunately, you will never be able to please everyone, but if you write with integrity, you will never go wrong! You’re awesome!

    Like

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